What to Wear on the Homestead

Several years ago I read a magazine article about the trend of women wearing aprons making a comeback. The author had a passion for wearing aprons as a utilitarian accessory on a daily basis. I loved the look and reminiscing on how women in the 1950s would never fail to don an apron. So naturally I collected vintage aprons whenever I could find them! I don't wear one every day, but I'm going to get my aprons out and display them in my kitchen so I can have them handy as I work this spring on my modern homestead. Aprons keep your clothes clean and add a feminine touch. Aprons look equally good with dresses, skirts, jeans, or capris.

I want to encourage you lovely homemakers to take the time to put on clothes you feel good in every day. Moms, try to avoid dressing like teenage boys. You know, a boxy t-shirt, ill fitting jeans (a.k.a. "mom jeans"), and running shoes. Running shoes should never, ever be worn unless running! Never. Ever. Leave flip flops to the kids unless you are going to the pool or beach. Wear a real shoe that gives you some support. You will have more energy, get more done, and your smile will be brighter while you run errands if you feel good about how you look, rather than hoping no one you know will see you. Do something with your hair and put on a little makeup. Scarves worn on the head can cover a bad hair day and give your look a hint of vintage style.

For gardening, ladies, you need the proper gear, and there is no reason not to look fabulous doing it! A wide- brimmed straw hat, a casual cotton dress, pretty garden gloves, and cute wellies or clogs fit the bill. Make sure you have gloves thick enough to protect your hands from prickly weeds and thorny rose bushes! (Picture a British beauty at work in an English garden, with a bit of eccentric style.)

To keep you organized, make sure you store your winter clothes away. Only clothes that are in season should be in your dressers and closets right now, although you will want to keep a few sweaters and long sleeved shirts and pants available for this transitional period when weather can be unpredictable. Having off-season clothes still in one's closet makes it difficult to get dressed in the morning. You can't even see what you have if your drawers are stuffed too full.

Being a stay-at-home homesteader does not mean you have to dress like your kids, or at the opposite end of the spectrum, look boring and matronly. You can be feminine, pretty, and practical all at the same time!!

It's Garage Sale Time Again!

Today my family and I took a country drive to a flea market at a tiny, old school. I found a pair of pewter, pillar candle holders from Bombay, India for $2. This is the kind of thing you are looking for to create your wabi sabi home. Items such as this, which are made of natural materials and are not new and mass-produced, or are vintage or antique, that have the patina of a bygone era, take time to collect. The wabi sabi home evolves organically. One does not run out to the mall and buy a complete room's worth of things. You must be willing to leave spaces in your home bare until just the right item can be found. Creating space for something new is part of the process.

The danger to be avoided with garage sales is buying worthless stuff just because it is cheap. Stick with the principle of only purchasing those items which you believe to be beautiful and/or know to be useful. If it is new, it should be handmade. And for every item you buy, plan to give two things you own away! That way you are not accumulating clutter, which goes against the wabi sabi aesthetic. Think quality, intrinsic meaning, and things that tell a story. Imperfect beauty is a virtue. Frayed edges, chipped paint or wood, and rusted metal are not only allowed, but desired!

Wabi sabi is a Japanese tradition, and another way of that culture is to rotate your prized possessions seasonally. Think about how you bring out certain decorations for Christmas, and then you pack them back up for the year. You may also bring out special items for Easter, Halloween and other holidays. If you rotate what you have on display in your home, then you won't be tempted to set everything you own out at once, so you can more easily practice the art of restraint. Another advantage is that it's like having new things every few months! You bring them out and think, "Oh, I forgot about this wall hanging (or rug, pottery piece, or basket)," and you have the chance to fall in love with it all over again. Think also of asymetrical design, like you would find things in nature. A couple of budding branches in an old pottery vase placed alone on a fireplace mantle would be so wabi sabi.

When you head out to flea markets and garage sales, it is helpful to make a list of particular items you need, for instance, wicker chairs for you porch. I have found that when I make a wish list, I'm much more likely to find the treasure, and at just the right price! So put on your comfortable shoes and sunglasses, pack a snack and take a reusable bottle of water with you, and let your wabi sabi adventure begin!!

Spring on the Modern Homestead

With temperatures in the 70s today, it is time to think about preparing for spring! Whether you live out in the country, in a town, suburb, or urban center, you can begin a return with me to the homesteading approach to living. I already have flowers budding and blooming in my yard! The robins, doves, and other birds have returned, and before you know it, the time will come to plant your garden. So for now, make a list of projects you want to accomplish this spring. Using either a notebook or individual note cards, write the name of each project at the top, and then a list of steps and materials needed to complete it. And ladies, it is fine to make lists for your husbands, too!

Meticulous cleaning is an obvious spring endeavor, but I want you to go deeper this year. It is hard to keep a cluttered house in reasonable order. So throw open the doors and windows, and start looking around. Do one room at a time. The bedroom should be a sanctuary, so always keep this room clean, dusted, vacuumed, and uncluttered. A peaceful room encourages peaceful sleep, and a messy room does just the opposite. Also set up at least one outdoor living area which is a sanctuary. This can be a screened (or not screened) porch, a patio, a bench in the yard next to a birdbath, the stoop at the top of your apartment steps, or a tree house. You need areas to which you can retreat while sorting out the rest of your spaces.

We will enlist the help of The Wabi Sabi House, by Robyn Griggs Lawrence, in order to visualize our pared down homesteads. Colors are earthy, the outdoors connects with the inner dwellings, natural materials are used, sound is reduced, life flows with the seasons, beauty is imperfect, and tranquility prevails. Oh, and there is a noticeable absence of stuff. Decorations are sparse but make a statement and are not mass produced. Nor is the interior stark. Handmade and vintage objects, unique treasures associated with cherished memories, and well-worn, well-loved artifacts abound. The home is homey and is a respite from the clamor of the outside world. Nothing is allowed that doesn't have meaning, usefulness, and/or beauty (and preferably contains all three!).

Some say that we can't return to a past era and way of life, as the protagonist played by Owen Wilson in the movie, Midnight in Paris wished fervently to do. I can relate to him. I have always felt that I belong to another time. A more romantic, more glamourous,  more magical, or more innocent time. Yes, we live in the here and now. You could replace your car with a horse and buggy, but you probably won't. Still, you could check your email less often, say, only once a day. Limit television viewing to 5 hours a week, or turn it off for a whole month (gasp!). For the love of God, at least unplug your children. Cell phones should not go to school and should be handed over at bedtime. A TV should never be in a child's bedroom (or yours either), and neither should a computer or video games.

I'm going to give you food for thought and track my own progress this spring. Let's see if we can, after all, turn back the clock just a smidgen to the days when humans were vitally connected to the earth, when kids played in the backyard using their imaginations, clothes were hung on the line, and women baked their own bread. Let's just experiment. Change our habits. Reinvent ourselves, our families, our lives! Let's wake up from our malaise and breathe the new air. A little at a time, one day at a time, here on the modern homestead.

The Modern Homestead, Part 2

I am beginning to formulate the idea that reinstituting the concept of the homestead could be one way to counter the malaise, obsession, and addiction that I attribute to our modern society's overuse of technology. My grandma made a very good point yesterday. She thinks the internet is trouble, because people will write something on Facebook or someone's blog that they would never say in person. A friend of mine says that's like blaming the gun rather than the person holding it. They are both right.

There's no doubt in my mind that we are too plugged in. TV is largely to blame for the fact that kids don't play outside much anymore, and both excessive TV watching and disassociation from nature lead to depression. Add the plugged in time of video games, cell phones, and internet use, and what have we become? People are notoriously too busy to get together in person, and I think they often make themselves busy on purpose. Real relationships and intimate, face to face, or even voice to voice, interactions are just something people have largely lost the ability to handle.

Just having a gun in the house presents a danger that would not exist otherwise. And it has been proven that TV and other technology easily become addictive. In our instant gratification society, blasting an online comment at someone without thinking it through (hello, attention span, where are you?) results in all kinds of drama. If you at least sit down and write a letter first and get your reactionary emotions out of your system, often times you get enough therapy in the process and don't even end up sending the letter. Or you take the time to revise it. With technology, it is too easy to forget that there is a living, breathing human being with feelings on the other side. Recently a family member half my age who lives across the country chastised my comment to another Facebook friend and told me what I should have written instead! I was posting on my own wall, and the subject had absolutely nothing to do with her. This is the risk with a social network.

So how can the homestead help? If you read the Little House on the Prairie books, you will know that pioneer people had no such time for idle gossip and the frittering away of hours upon hours of life that can never be retrieved (except maybe Mrs. Olsen!). Farmer Boy tells the story of Almanzo Wilder between the ages of 8 and 10. He helps sow and plow the fields, haul wood with his own team of oxen, shear sheep, make candles, cut ice from a pond, train his oxen, gets up in the middle of the night with his family to save a crop from freezing, and all manner of such hard work. He also sometimes goes to school, and after all of the other things I mentioned, he does his chores. I don't imagine anyone in his family was obese or nature deprived. Laziness was not an option. Getting up after the sun rises was not an option. And harrassing your sister was cause for a whipping.

Not everyone can be a farmer or even live out in the country, but homesteading is becoming popular even in urban areas. Gardens are grown on rooftops and abandoned parking lots. People grow food and raise chickens in very small yards. (Ironically, in my rural village, one cannot raise chickens inside the village limits!) Even if you live in an apartment and you don't have a yard, you can grow plants, flowers, and herbs in pots. Anyone can feed the birds and have a birdbath in the yard. Plant flowers that draw butterflies and hummingbirds to them. Encourage the livelihood of bees, without whom the planet would die. Live with a pet or two. Cook most of your own meals. Make contact with nature in some way a priority every day.

Ah, priorities. If television viewing is a priority, I believe such a person has largely lost sight of what is important. Please know I have been guilty of being too plugged in and zoned out. But we don't watch television in my home (but do watch video movies). I have no idea how anyone has time to watch TV now that I have not had it for over 4 years. I am going to take a sabbatical from the computer as of today, when I finish writing this, for more than a week. I need to detox. I challenge you to do the same!

If you center your day with the homestead idea in mind, you know what needs to be done. Feed your family and sit down together for meals. Plant seeds, weed the garden, harvest what you've grown. Water the flowers. Walk the dog. Spend time with your child, reading, playing board games, homeschooling, doing household tasks together. Invite a friend (by friend, I mean a real one, not the "friends" you have on Facebook who aren't actually friends) into your home. Visit your grandmother, write a friend a real letter in your own handwriting, donate things you no longer want or need to charity, learn a craft you can do with your hands, or to play an instrument or dance. Pray, meditate, read something edifying to your spirit. Write a poem or your memoirs. Dance with your daughter. Walk instead of driving your car. Bake cookies for the neighbor kids. Clean out your refrigerator, drawers, and closets. Pursue your passion! Oh my, where has the time gone? You are pleasantly exhausted from physical exertion and spending your day in meaningful activities, focusing on your priorities, and you haven't turned on the TV or your computer once! Now we are living, people, living our own lives, taking care of our own business, too sane to poke our noses where they don't belong.

Modern Homesteading, Part 1

Who would have thought that the first of November would be a sit-on-your-front-porch kind of day? Yet here it is, sunny and 60 degrees, with a mild breeze blowing. Sitting on the front porch is arguably an old-fashioned pastime. In some neighborhoods, the kind with strict rules and regulations, such behavior is even considered a detraction from the quality of the neighborhood!

An architect friend of mine, who used to live in New York City, told a story about how a person living in such a place was limited in the size of porch he could build onto his house so as to deter any temptation one might have to sit on it! "Do we want to see people sitting on porches here?" was the question. And an emphatic "No!" was the answer. Oh the horror of the idea of neighbors being able to see one another on porches! What if they smiled at each other? Worse yet, what if they talked to one another? What if they had barbeques and friends and relatives come to visit and they played music and horseshoes on the lawn? Yes, this is what America, sadly, is coming to.

What must be reclaimed, for this reason and a multitude of others, is the concept of the homestead. In his national best-selling book, Last Child in the Woods, Richard Louv describes the modern phenomenon of Nature Deprivation Disorder, which stunts the physical, emotional, psychological, and spiritual development of children (and also has adverse effects on adults). Children are over-scheduled with organized programs, as well as the fact of being constantly "plugged in" to technology, leaving them no time to play freely outdoors. This disassociation with the natural world greatly contributes to the rise in obesity, attention disorders, and depression.

And front porches aren't the only casualties of snobbery and a profound disconnection from nature. In some communities, outdoor play is actually criminalized. Partially for fear of lawsuits, climbing trees is outlawed, and building a tree house is illegal on one's own property, lest a neighbor think it detracts from his view, or because it violates building codes. Thankfully, I live in just the sort of backwards, antiquated small town that allows porch living and tree climbing!

I do sometimes fantasize about living in the country and having a small family farm, which is definitely a lifestyle choice that is making a comeback. However, I love my historic 1908 home in town, and it is nice to be able to walk our dog and stop to chat with neighbors (who are outside on their porches, for heaven's sake, or doing dastardly deeds like gardening or yard work!). It is also convenient to walk to places such as the post office, grocery, drug store, church, gift shop, pharmacy, library, and bank, or to ride bikes to visit my grandparents. Less need to drive a car, so more sustainable than living in the country in that respect. I have been reading a lot lately about urban homesteading, so I will continue to write on this topic in a short series. In the meantime, turn off the TV and shove your kids outside to enjoy the last, glorious days of autumn. And you get out there too!!